Thursday, May 20, 2010


Couples who are already married and those planning on getting married today are all exposed to the easy availability of information about sexuality in all its many forms. Indeed high school and even junior high school children are not immune to this exposure nor are they void of curiosity about knowledge of and desire to experiment sexually. Consequently once a couple begins dating seriously, evolves into exclusivity, becomes engaged, most of the time, marriage follows. Research supports that once married, both partners prefer a monogamous relationship. A monogamous relationship with both partners devoted to one another and willing to experience sexual activity just with one another has been the norm for a very long time. Still, all intentions notwithstanding, myriad numbers of people have extra-marital affairs. No one is immune from having affairs disrupt their lives or the lives of those they care about; they happen to all kinds of people, in all walks of life.

Poor communication , or the lack of it contributes to a wide variey of family issues that may motivate some individuals to seek pleasure or comfort with another partner during their marriage. For example the economic status of each family affects communication. Families in the United States and other coutries have been facing a very difficult time during the current worsening of the economy. More than a million jobs were lost in 2008, more in 2009 and the losses continue in 2010. While congressional leaders, the presidential cabinet and economist advisors struggle to restore economic stability to a path of growth and less unemployment, primary wage earners who have lost their jobs must accept a standard of living that has declined. Many workers with large companies and managerial positions have been forced to let go of people they supervise and take on their job responsibilities. Educators in the public school systems of most states have received pink slips and lost their teaching jobs. Classified employees , county workers, and all sectors of private industry have reduced their work forces. The housing industry and related service businesses have contributred to huge losses in revenue for individuals . This becomes a source of contention, disappointment, depression and sometimes despair for the entire family.

The level of stress and pressure on each parent to cope with what work they do have, children's needs, finances, long hours or mis-matched schedules, not enough sleep and bruised egos are all reasons for desperately seeking something that makes a person feel better and often that is an affair. Those in an on-going affair might feel the pinch economically in using money with an extra partner to consider.

Frequently couples think- if only we could win the lottery or the Publisher's Clearing House, then we'd be ok. It can be depressing to think about your income and people you know who seem to be (or are) wealthier than you. There is an interesting site you might want to take a look at that helps you put your particular economic situation in perspective. Take a look at the Global Rich List. http://http// Making a comparison can serve to lighten heavy feeling and enable a couple to talk about what they really do have. Leaning toward the positive can increase optimism that the current financial condition will end and that working together through the down times might persuade a partner to feel more inclined to invest energy in the relationship instead of seeking to escape.

What else could you be doing to make things better?